Chitanduro ndechina amai mugoti unopiwa anyerere

Vanhu vakanyarara vanowanzowirwa nemakomborero avasina kukumbira

It is mothers prerogative to give the cooking stick to the silent child

Some favours or blessings befall those who do not clamour or beg for them.

The proverb is based on the act that was common when children watched their mother cooking and would clamour to be the ones who could lick the cooking spoon. The clever mother would give the quiet child as a reward for not screaming for the cooking spoon. This was done to teach the children the importance of patience, humility and that one does not always get their way. This practice was then used to ensure that people understand that they will not always get what they want and that there is reward in quietly going on about things.

The proverb is used to prevent people from demanding or clamouring for favours and to learn that they will not always get what they want. It should not be used where there is no one clamouring for any favour as it is used to differentiate the quiet one from the “noisy” ones. An example is at the workplace when others are not working but complaining for a pay rise and there is someone else who is working quietly, the quiet worker may get the reward. The proverb is often abused to deny people what is rightfully theirs yet it is merely to prevent a misguided sense of entitlement.